BoomerGirl Diary

Don’t get me wrong. I love when my kids are home, or even staying for weeks or months, but at the same time…

Arna was home most recently for three days. He’d been studying Hebrew in Israel for six weeks.

“Mom, I’m only home for three days…” became the refrain.

“Arna, did you take out your dog?”

“Mom, I’m only home for three days. I don’t have time to take the dog out..”

“Arna, could you please move your car?”

“Mom, I’m only home for three days…”

“Arna, we have barely seen you.”

“Sorry I’ve been busy. I guess I’m open for breakfast on Thursday morning, but it’ll have to be quick…and preferably at IHOP.”

What’s really hard is to cover all of Arna’s favorite restaurants in three days AND to see everybody he’s ever known since first grade…

Bob catches on slowly, “Where’s he going now? It’s almost 10 o’clock.”
“Movies and then to somebody’s apartment.”

“How do you know?”

“Hiding in the pantry and overheard a conversation with somebody… Kind of awkward…once I started listening I was stuck there…”

“Why’s he need to go to the movies?”

I stare at my husband in amazement. First of all, he uses the word “need” which makes me say, “Why does a 20 year old ‘need’ do anything? It’s complicated and beyond our understanding. Why do people who are probably two blocks away from each other with a phone in their very hands text message each other?”

“Mom, I need a bookcase and a bedside table. Do we have anything around here?”
“Start on the third floor and look in that storage room.” Parts of our house are starting to look peculiar. In the kids’ old bedrooms there are random piles of books, lamps sitting next to nothing—the remnants of the childhood bedroom that has been stripped by needy college students.

Suddenly the three days are over. The parade of cars in the driveway is over. The car is stuffed yet again with a bookcase, an end table, enough clothes for a small country (“Mom, I hate doing laundry.”) The third year (Arna is a junior) has begun.

That evening we get a call from Arna. “Mom, do you have a pencil and paper. I’ll give you a list of all the things I forgot. Mostly, my watch. I think it’s somewhere on the couch. That’s the last place I remember having it.”

“You mean you left it in the TV room the last night you were home when you watched that documentary about rock concerts until 2:00am. I kept waking up and wondering why people were clapping and shouting.”

“No, the night before… it’s somewhere in the basement…Will you look for it, please?”

I found it under the cushions. I took it to my favorite package store on 6th Street.

“Hey, Joel. I’m not sending anything weird today, just a watch with more to come later.”

I have sent a six pack of cokes (when Arna lost his canteen card at camp), pillows, underwear, shoes, and coats. I’ve also sent lots of food in the past. So today even when other customers come in, I don’t need to hide. They always pack stuff for me or I would never get anything sent so the contents of a package are no secret.

Another new apartment, and another new year. I’m excited for him and wonder what this apartment looks like and how the roommates will get along. Since it’s Iowa City I hope the apartment is up high. I remember all the flooding last June and Arna’s evacuation for a week during summer school. Things keep happening and life changes constantly for Arna and most college students.

I am thinking about Arna and I walk outside. Since we live on campus, I hear rock music all afternoon and evening. The fraternity boys nearby seem to be living outdoors next to a recently purchased and installed aboveground swimming pool. I know that the sand is coming. I start walking in the other direction and see the students walking back from the bookstore. I see other students on tours of the campus. I see another student in a “Krehbiel Hall” t-shirt, a brand new scholarship hall at KU. Many students are talking on cell phones or text messaging friends.

My cell phone is ringing. “Mom, my books are really expensive. I just went to the bookstore… I had to buy a new lamp and a bicycle lock…”

I wonder if the students I see are having the same conversation with their folks.

“Oh, I just wanted to remind you that I’ll probably be back for the second KU football game. I’ll only be home for three days…”